So, www.goingbacktomyfirstlove.blogspot.com is back online! :) The timing of finally being able to unlock this blog today, I think it is fate. ;)
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There are moments such as this when I suddenly stop and realize how days or even months slip by so fast! Its amazing how we are just a few weeks away from 2013! Oh yes another year is about to begin and before we even know it people are posting their new year's resolutions list on their FB pages. I don't know about you but some of my resolutions never seem to materialize. The last time I wrote such a list, among the top items said that "I will never wait for anyone for more than 30 minutes". But from my latest meeting alone, I don't think the resolution was applied at all.
So to shake it up a little bit, I will not list the things that I want to change or improve, instead let me share with you how the last 11 months turned my life in many different ways.
A 2012 Revolutionized Perspective:
1. Learned to better appreciate and understand the intricate details of Boss-Staff relationship.
I know that there are different facets to consider when trying to foster an effective and harmonious relationship with the people working for you and with you. Employees working for companies probably have a bigger and more complex bucket list to be filled for them to work efficiently and stay with the company for a long time. It varies per person, per company, and even per industry.
I had been blessed with the chance to turn the table around and see this kind of relationship from, should I say, the "Employer's" perspective. This year, I had the opportunity to handle a bigger group of people compared to the group that I was handling in the past 3 years of doing the business. For this year, the challenge of understanding different personalities, transfer of skills, influencing, and motivating different persons all came together as one giant fusion that filled up my to do list. And it was difficult but I can't back down. My team is composed of individuals who have simple lifestyles and backgrounds. And these different personalities actually taught me be to be a better leader and a listener at the same time.
I, being a hardcore choleric-melancholic, always had a tough time listening to negative responses and sometimes even to little suggestions (gosh this is an understatement hehe). I hate hearing words like "hindi kaya", hindi pwede", and "hindi ko alam". Believe me, metaphorically and physically, I would feel burning sensation in my ear whenever I hear these negative phrases. However, as I spend more projects working with these people and learned how to understand and handle one personality from the other, I eventually learned to listen through the negative and actually allow them to contribute ideas. So now when they say they can't do it in the way that I want, I finally learned to encourage them to think so they can suggest alternative ways to do things efficiently and creatively. And there are times, some of their ideas actually worked. That's good for me, the team and our clients. :) We really are not perfect, even I know that, but then again, we strive to improve and become better in what we do as a team.
I, being a hardcore choleric-melancholic, always had a tough time listening to negative responses and sometimes even to little suggestions (gosh this is an understatement hehe). I hate hearing words like "hindi kaya", hindi pwede", and "hindi ko alam". Believe me, metaphorically and physically, I would feel burning sensation in my ear whenever I hear these negative phrases. However, as I spend more projects working with these people and learned how to understand and handle one personality from the other, I eventually learned to listen through the negative and actually allow them to contribute ideas. So now when they say they can't do it in the way that I want, I finally learned to encourage them to think so they can suggest alternative ways to do things efficiently and creatively. And there are times, some of their ideas actually worked. That's good for me, the team and our clients. :) We really are not perfect, even I know that, but then again, we strive to improve and become better in what we do as a team.
After working with them for a year (and some of them for even longer), the experience taught me that the foundation of leader-subordinate relationship becomes strong and effective when built on discipline, respect (of people's time, ideas, resources, decisions, physical capacities and limitations, etc.), trust, integrity, and open communication.
To my staff who worked with me since the business began, but most importantly those who worked with me from 2011 to present day (now at 2014), thank you. You rock, team CPB! :)
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| Work at Tagaytay |
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| Stage Design at Calamba, Laguna |
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| Wedding at Sonya's Garden |
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| Wedding at Sta. Rosa, Laguna |
2. The process of Letting Go, Moving On, and Growing Up
Letting Go. Accepting that talents can be passed on and people, when properly trained, can do what you can do, and sometimes they can do it better. It took practice, faith, and more importantly, lowering of one's pride.
It took me years to accept that I cannot do a one-man show forever. During the early part of my Entrepreneurial Journey, I had this delusion that I had super powers. I thought that with some of the leg work out of the way, I can be on center stage all by myself and do a great job. When my projects were smaller, yes I did a spectacular job on my own. Then as the projects expand in scope and details, my stellar performance could not hold up much longer without any help. So I had to hire and train people, which means that I had to share the secrets of the trade, I had to allow people to see what goes behind the magic, and eventually teach them to perform on center stage with me. Letting go for me means acceptance, trust, and yes even humility. Slowly I learned to unravel the tricks and steps locked up in my brain that I have developed for years, lay the process and techniques on the table, and teach it to my staff one step at a time. Letting go for me means harvesting extraordinary patience and having faith in someone else's creativity and perseverance. It wasn't easy for me since the process did not only involve transfer of skills. Its more of asking someone to take care of something that is very precious to me.
It took me years to accept that I cannot do a one-man show forever. During the early part of my Entrepreneurial Journey, I had this delusion that I had super powers. I thought that with some of the leg work out of the way, I can be on center stage all by myself and do a great job. When my projects were smaller, yes I did a spectacular job on my own. Then as the projects expand in scope and details, my stellar performance could not hold up much longer without any help. So I had to hire and train people, which means that I had to share the secrets of the trade, I had to allow people to see what goes behind the magic, and eventually teach them to perform on center stage with me. Letting go for me means acceptance, trust, and yes even humility. Slowly I learned to unravel the tricks and steps locked up in my brain that I have developed for years, lay the process and techniques on the table, and teach it to my staff one step at a time. Letting go for me means harvesting extraordinary patience and having faith in someone else's creativity and perseverance. It wasn't easy for me since the process did not only involve transfer of skills. Its more of asking someone to take care of something that is very precious to me.
Moving On.
The art of moving on taught me something new for this year. Its like moving on in reverse. I always had this notion that moving on generally means, "Having-Losing-Accepting-Forgetting-Moving Forward". Little did I know that the process can be stirred up and it will still do a person good. The process can also be in the order of "Losing-Accepting-Forgetting-Having-Moving Forward". Sometimes there are things that you have to do or accomplish or experiences that you have to go through before you reach a state of inner peace, which a person normally gets with acceptance and moving forward. Have you ever had that experience wherein you always run into the same situation/problem/people/dream until you finally "man up" and face them with all courage? Sometimes we feel that we have "lost it/him/her" and we learn to deal with the loss, accept it wholeheartedly, and even sometimes erase them completely from our memories. However, somewhere along the way, we would "casually" run into the same person/event/dream/mistake/situation until we look them in the eye and say "Ok let's get this over with". Then when you do, that's the time, that you have really "moved on".
I am saying this because I have been running into an item on my To-do/dream list that I thought that I will never ever accomplish ( I have been putting this off for nearly 5 years). But I just keep on running into it, my mind almost seem to long for it. I just can't have that inner peace until I finally take the courage to do it. It feels like when I avoid it for the nth time, it will never get tired of calling out for me, because that's my destiny. So finally, I have decided to tackle that road this coming month. Little-barely-baby-steps at time, it will take me a looong time (about 3 years hopefully) to finish, but I strongly feel that its really my destiny to go through this experience. So, though I am scared, uncertain of what lies ahead, and even sometimes doubtful if I am even worthy to stare at it squarely in the eye, I am doing it. Finally. And hopefully when I do, it will stop haunting me, and give me a little bit more inner peace. Asking for your prayers. :) Hint, it has something to do with achieving a what seems to be an impossible dream. (Another hint, now at 2014, I am currently more than a year into my "ID" dream ;) )
***photo -2014
Growing Up.
This is what growing up meant to me not only for this year but in the last 2 years: It meant embracing humility, learning how to ask and accept sincere help and assistance from friends and loved ones, listening and considering ideas and opinions different from mine, and more importantly seeing the hand of God in the series of events that transpired in the last 4 years of my roller coaster life. Growing up also meant seeing myself in the light of how God sees me -precious, full of potential, and living out those potentials.
***Unfinished piece. But I will leave it just as it is. ;)
The art of moving on taught me something new for this year. Its like moving on in reverse. I always had this notion that moving on generally means, "Having-Losing-Accepting-Forgetting-Moving Forward". Little did I know that the process can be stirred up and it will still do a person good. The process can also be in the order of "Losing-Accepting-Forgetting-Having-Moving Forward". Sometimes there are things that you have to do or accomplish or experiences that you have to go through before you reach a state of inner peace, which a person normally gets with acceptance and moving forward. Have you ever had that experience wherein you always run into the same situation/problem/people/dream until you finally "man up" and face them with all courage? Sometimes we feel that we have "lost it/him/her" and we learn to deal with the loss, accept it wholeheartedly, and even sometimes erase them completely from our memories. However, somewhere along the way, we would "casually" run into the same person/event/dream/mistake/situation until we look them in the eye and say "Ok let's get this over with". Then when you do, that's the time, that you have really "moved on".
I am saying this because I have been running into an item on my To-do/dream list that I thought that I will never ever accomplish ( I have been putting this off for nearly 5 years). But I just keep on running into it, my mind almost seem to long for it. I just can't have that inner peace until I finally take the courage to do it. It feels like when I avoid it for the nth time, it will never get tired of calling out for me, because that's my destiny. So finally, I have decided to tackle that road this coming month. Little-barely-baby-steps at time, it will take me a looong time (about 3 years hopefully) to finish, but I strongly feel that its really my destiny to go through this experience. So, though I am scared, uncertain of what lies ahead, and even sometimes doubtful if I am even worthy to stare at it squarely in the eye, I am doing it. Finally. And hopefully when I do, it will stop haunting me, and give me a little bit more inner peace. Asking for your prayers. :) Hint, it has something to do with achieving a what seems to be an impossible dream. (Another hint, now at 2014, I am currently more than a year into my "ID" dream ;) )
Growing Up.
This is what growing up meant to me not only for this year but in the last 2 years: It meant embracing humility, learning how to ask and accept sincere help and assistance from friends and loved ones, listening and considering ideas and opinions different from mine, and more importantly seeing the hand of God in the series of events that transpired in the last 4 years of my roller coaster life. Growing up also meant seeing myself in the light of how God sees me -precious, full of potential, and living out those potentials.
***Unfinished piece. But I will leave it just as it is. ;)
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