A Few Good Men

Spent my last two days relaxing and enjoying the company of two of my super close friends. It was a very chill-come-what-may kind of weekend. The dip in the pool almost literally froze our insides, which were eventually thawed by the cup of hot brewed coffee that we had together with some mouth watering pastries. It was very satisfying! Together with the good eats and great company, the three of us had interesting conversations, covering topics from the silliest down to the most meaningful. You know for sure that you're in the company of people you love and who loves you as much, when you can actually bare your heart and soul, without having to worry about being judged or misunderstood. You can speak your mind, regardless of whether you agree with a certain idea or not, and know for for sure that you will learn something new from the exchange of thoughts.

One of our topics included the recent passing of the DILG secretary Mr. Jesse Robredo. The internet is now filled with inspiring words about his life. He was described as a good man and one of those rare politicians who gives life to the words "public servant", because he literally served the people of Naga as their mayor for three consecutive terms, and later served in the Department of the Interior and Local Government, where he had the opportunity to serve the country on a greater scale. And from the good words and high regard of people from his native province, and also from his family, constituents, and colleagues, one can actually have a glimpse of the kind of life that he lived. He sincerely made a difference in the lives of many people.

From this conversation, stemmed the question: What exactly makes a good man? My friend raised this question and asked for our opinion. I stopped and dug a little deeper into my thoughts. After pondering for a while, I realized that:

A good man is someone who is balanced. He has a little of everything that is significant. He is responsible, cares and spends quality and consistent time with his family, strives and excels in his chosen work, someone who is honest, knows how to treat people with respect regardless of who they are. He is not too good at one thing to compensate for something that is non-negotiable. For example, he is a good provider to his family and helpful to the community around  him, and yet, has a temper, so short-fused, it clouds his better judgement and decision making. Like a pendulum swinging from one extreme end to the other.

He is balanced because he understands the importance of each aspect of his life. He is far from perfect, but his flaws are forgiveable. He is aware of his limitations and knows how to manage each of it to adapt to different circumstances. And most importantly, he has an integrity with a solid foundation rooted in faith. A good man has humility to admit that his goodness is not self-made. A good man knows that his goodness comes from the Source of it all. He has God in his life, that's why he bears good meaningful fruit, instead of a fruit that is grandiose yet empty bitter. You know that someone is a good man, if his children (and or people he has encountered in his lifetime) speaks of him with much pride and respect. Lastly, a good man only has one consistent face, but wears many hats. (And yes, this applies to both men and women.)

In the middle of our conversation about the characteristics of a  "good man", my friend came across an essay written by the daughter of Mr. Robredo. The essay written by Aika Robredo won the grand prize for the high school category of the Ramon Magsaysay Student Essay Competition in 2003. Every word in the then, 15-year old Aika's essay was filled with words of highest respect and admiration. Not solely influenced by their relationship as father and daughter, but because the man, on top of being the best father and head of the family, also exemplified all the characteristics of person (and public servant) deserving of a Ramon Magsaysay Award. It was a piece every Filipino ought to read and appreciate. After reading the article I realized that a good man is also someone who can create ripples of his legacy within his family and community. He strives to share himself to the people around him, giving back, what was lovingly given to him. He shares his heart and mind and creates an impact. A good man knows the goodness in him and uses this to the fullest to make a difference that benefits many and not only for himself. A good man stands by his beliefs, doing what is right, not what is easy.


Hopefully the remaining people of such characteristics will continue to share their light and will never grow tired and weary of doing good. By so doing, their light may touch others who are struggling, and hopefully they too, will eventually be motivated to live a life worthy of high respects.


There are a few good men - friends (soul siblings) who will love you no matter where life takes you; and honest and effective public servants like Mr. Robredo. I hope we will always have in us the ability to distinguish the real deal, from the wannabes. Life will be so much better if we really know the difference between the genuine and the fake.
Like gold, the fake cracks and melts under the fire, while the genuine is purified by the fire and shimmers with radiance because of it.

To my treasures, my soul siblings, I will always be grateful for your life and our friendship. I love you with all of my heart.

To Mr. Jesse Robredo, Sir, I may not know you personally, but the ripple that you created reached me and made an impact. Thank you. You are now home with the Lord.  May you rest in peace. And to your family, may the Holy Spirit embrace you and comfort you at this time of mourning. My sincerest and deepest condolences.